Vengeance Fixes Nothing

Well, it's a quick fix as a band aid perhaps. Make one feel better for a really short time leaving doubt in the mind. Maybe even wanting more. A fix as in a rush, but nothing more as it is a chemical burst hiding out lowdown among the everyday. It's tempting because you have a hurt that can't heal. Brooding the fear behind it that you remain broken. Justice for the wrong that has been made against you. The tears and the broken heart. You want it to go away yesterday but it extends it's stay as long as it can be tolerated and tormenting. Want to hand it to someone else to carry so you lash out at the person who hurt you. An eye for eye to balance the scales. The stole your joy or maybe a nearby lash out at a proxy just so it's gone and more convenient. Who care who is innocent or made mistake. Forgiveness doesn't work, right. Cheated and robbed. Here is a grand example to show how I am feeling right now.

Tuesday August 26th, 2025 1:50pm: my wife, Kelly, and I were in a serious car accident right near Roosevelt University in Schaumburg. Kelly was going to drop me off at work and didn't get there. We were T-boned by a car that didn't stop at a red light. The car is totaled, and we are bruised up, but nothing broken.

God was with us in so many ways. Help arrived quickly. Bystanders showed up out of nowhere to help us. Calling 911 and making sure we were conscious, ready to pry those doors off if they needed. God was with us.

The air bags worked, and the car did its job kept us safe. Our daughter,Katy, was not with us; she was to meet Kelly at Roosevelt via lyft. She was safe. The insurance company got us a loaner and people at my work and Kelly’s work have been nothing but kind covering our shifts. Medics: police and ER staff were also understanding and kind.

We are shaken but God never left us. It hurts to walk right now but it will get better. Got wait to see how much we will get to replace the car but we are okay. God is faithful and will never fail us.

Why am I writing this? I am trying not to want revenge. Some of my friends think that we should sue the driver for pain and suffering. Yes the car is gone and no we got the headache of going through the insurance to replace. We have medical bills waiting to arrive. We got other bills such as Katy's college. We do not completely know what comes next?

The bruises will heal and fear will subside but I want it fixed now. I am jittery right now with cars as the crash happened on my side of the car. I have to lean on God for the strengthen to overcome this. Only God can show me the way. God is the only one who knows how to piece it all together. We are not God as God knows the burden, carrying it to help us.

I cannot lean on God if I hold on to my anger. Be angry but let it go. It is toxic. God is not toxic. God lives through this world and I am very grateful. God can fix us if we ask him to because otherwise ignore Him and not see the healing. Why? Cause we want others to suffer sometimes. We are human. And God is God.

I hope others will see that who may be going through a rough patch to know vengeance rots your soul. So tempting as to me the person who hit us seems to walked off fine.

The Insurance company said we are not at fault and I already knew that. A part of me wants to make this person hurt for the pain she caused us. Then I remember that this was an accident. It was done to do no harm. It happened and vengeance becomes too easy to live for. Gets through a moment and then you want more. Turns your heart numb and ruins the perception of life in general. Steals your joy therefore you can no longer feel the sun on your face or the wind through the fingers because you are always expecting bad stuff to happen. Power is power. Power is fleeting. No one should want that. Trust God and He will fix. Listen to God and we can forgive. We can love or try to do so.